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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Teatime


I just want to make one thing very clear. I am not a teacup. I am not a coffee mug or a koozie or a travelmug or any other patronizing diminutive used to describe small animals. If one more biped asks if I am a teacup, I swear I'm going to go Rambo all over them.

And what in the hell does that mean anyway? Am I a teacup? NO, I AM A CHIHUAHUA. A little education--the American Kennel Club (which by the way promotes a genetic conformity in us dogs that long ago crossed the Nietzschean threshold for the development of a race of überhunds. I mean, seriously, this is beyond fascism at its worst) classifies my ethnic subgroup "Chihuahua" as a Toy Breed. We are already small. Our breed average is 6 pounds. I am just over 3 pounds and thus just barely within the show worthy limits of the AKC (as if I need to have something else to have anxiety about!).

Here's the AKC website:

Chihuahua Breed Standards

And here's a video of me doing to a young Chihuahua what I will do to the next biped that calls me a teacup!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Taylor! This is Tiffany -- Jessica's friend in Nashville.

Please tell Clovis that my dog Beau suffers the from the same issue -- he is a yorkie and everyone asks if he is a teacup. He gets quite miffed and retorts "Have you ever seen a tea cup with fur?? No. I didn't think so. Idiot."

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Provincetown, Massachusetts, United States
I am a California native transplanted to the East Coast and have grown to accept both the snowy weather of winter and the hard-bitten attitudes of New Englanders. Since I moved here in October of 2006, I think I've become something of a native, although the locals will always call me a "bark-ashore". If you have any questions, just ask!